Before becoming a therapist, I had no idea what it meant to “hold space” for somebody. I’d never heard the term. But now, the term proliferates social media and serves as the foundation of mine (and most other therapists') work. Holding space is the backbone of supportive relationships and bridges the gap between two people when one person is in distress.

Welcome to the world of emotional parentification. Emotional parentification is a role reversal in families during which, according to famed family therapist Salvador Minunchin “a child fulfill[s] the role of a parent within the family subsystem.” Emotional parentification can look like a child mediating between family members, acting as a parent’s de facto therapist, and being privy to their parents’ adult issues, such as dating struggles or financial woes.

By the time many of my clients get to therapy, they have tried everything to address their anxiety. They have ignored it. Numbed it. Stuffed it down. Used gratitude. Reminded themselves that others have it worse. Shamed themselves. Blamed themselves. Bullied themselves. Nothing works!

Building new friendships is difficult and time-intensive. Research shows that building a new acquaintanceship requires dozens of hours of interaction, while a best friendship requires hundreds of hours.

It may not occur to adults to go to family therapy with their parents. Family therapy conjures up images of parents trying to manage young children or get through to stubborn teenagers. But family therapy has many important applications for adult children and their parents. After all, the longest phase of parenthood is that of parenting adult children, and adult children are often craving a close, loving bond with their parents.

When a client tells me that their parent has once again requested that they call more, I hear that parent's plea for closeness. I hear the parent’s hope that they will have a close bond with their adult child that includes sharing good news, tough problems, and life stories.

Dad has a temper. Everybody in the family knows that to keep a calm house; nobody can upset Dad. Mom frequently reminds the kids not to upset their father and hides potential sources of stress from him like a bad report card, a car dent, or a financial setback. The kids know how to read his moods from little details—like the pitch of his voice or how loudly the front door closes. When they sense their father’s stress increasing, the kids walk on eggshells, taking up as little space as possible.

There’s a term going around Instagram and TikTok that you won’t find in any psychology textbook but has nonetheless become pervasive. That term is “cycle-breaker.” A cycle-breaker is somebody who sees an unhealthy cycle of behavior in their family of origin (meaning the family they grew up in) and intentionally works to break that cycle.

Despite its prevalence, grief continues to be deeply misunderstood. It has become codified, rigid, and narrow. Instead of a broad, uncertain experience that is deeply individualized, mourners often internalize beliefs about how they should experience their own grieving process. The truth about grief is far gentler. Here are six tough but comforting truths about grief.

Friendships go through phases, ebbing and flowing over months and years. But sometimes, once important friendships start to fade. Here are five signs that you and a friend are truly growing apart.

In close, healthy relationships, adult children may confide in their parents when something goes wrong. When they choose not to reach out to their parents, a few reasons might be at play.

Unsolicited advice-giving. When an adult child approaches their parent with a problem, parents may immediately jump into solution mode and try to fix it. And while some adult children find that helpful, others find it premature, looking instead to feel understood and validated before, or instead of, solution-seeking.

Grief is a far-reaching, ordinary experience that comes and goes as we move through life. The better we understand that, the better equipped we are to meet the challenges of allowing ourselves to grieve when we need to.

Our messaging around friendship is one-dimensional. We often speak of friendships in platitudes like “best friends forever” and ignore the complexity of these important relationships. Out of this simplicy, myths have emerged. Here are eight myths about friendship that need to be debunked: